Dream of White Buffalo Calf Woman

Last night I dreamt that as a female elder of an indigenous North American tribe, White Buffalo Calf Woman appeared to me and presented several sacred, material gifts for the tribe--these in addition to her previous, ancient gifts of spiritual and practical teachings. The gifts were a beautiful, room-size rug woven in earth tones and blues that told a story to the tribe, a small, exquisite, intricately woven rug, a three-foot painted, carved wooden likeness of herself, and a plain black metal (iron?) ladle.

I then presented the gifts to the tribe and we placed them in the longhouse with a consecration ceremony. The large rug was laid near the meeting space, the small rug was hung on the wall in a prominent location, the statue was set in a Northeast corner, and the ladle was put to use for soups and broths made over the main cooking fire. My people loved the gifts and were constantly turning to them, offering gratitude, acknowledging their sacredness, and receiving their comfort and great blessings.

The ladle was used daily with great appreciation, eventually showing normal signs of wear.

After a time, though, the people started losing site of the sacredness of these gifts. They no longer cared for the large rug, trampling into it ashes and fire-black, wood debris, dust, and dry leaves and grasses. So I quietly took on the care of the rug, sweeping and shaking it alone. I began to feel concern for my people and reminded them of the sacredness of the rug. I hoped and prayed that with patience they would truly remember.

Then I discovered that the sacred statue had become oily, dented, and worn, and its paint flecked, from repeatedly being handled in a rough, playful manner, rather than with the respect it was due. My patience began dissolving into irritation and sorrow. I realized there was nothing I could do to restore the statue. I prayed daily to White Buffalo Calf Woman and the ancestors for guidance, but none came.

When the day came that I spotted a group of young women giggling while trying to pull down the intricate wall hanging, I erupted. Boiling rage, frustration, and despair rose up simultaneously in me, overtaking any familiar sense of self. I rushed over to the women waving my arms, so enraged that I could not speak. My commotion caught their attention and stopped their actions. I tried to shout at them to make them realize their disrespect and foolishness, but only faint squeaking noises escaped from my rage-constricted throat. My furious squeaking served only to spark another spasm of their giggling and they returned to their intent.

Through the rage that seemed to explode my being, the thought arose What will become of us?

Choosing Happiness

One of my favorite points in personal growth is the moment when I realize I have a choice in how I react to any particular situation. It often feels like there is no choice: an event happens and my feelings arise instantaneously. If someone insults me, what else could I feel but hurt and ticked off? However, there is a nanosecond before my feelings arise in which I can make a choice. I can choose to judge the event differently and thereby react differently. That moment--when I see a choice--is my favorite one. Even if I can't actually make a better choice right then, simply seeing there is a choice opens the door to emotional freedom and more happiness. I no longer feel at the mercy of my emotions.

For example, my grown daughter and I have developed a pattern over the years. She occasionally comes to me for advice when she has a problem. And I, of course, offer the perfect solution. She then tells me why that solution won't work. So I come up with perfect solution number two, and she tells me why that one won't work either. So, I think a moment and come up with solution number three. (I'm pretty good at this.) Then I hear how that won't work either. And so on. We both come away from the conversation feeling frustrated and irritated. I vow never again to give my unappreciative daughter advice--a vow that lasts until the next time she asks. It's a cycle that doesn't create happiness for either of us.

However, suddenly in the middle of yet another of these frustrating conversations I got it! I saw a choice! So, I immediately shut up. I rested a couple of beats, took a deep breath, and said, "You know Sweetie, I don't have an answer. That's really a challenging situation, but I know you're a capable, intelligent young woman and you'll be able to figure out a solution soon. I love you." After a stunned silence she replied, "Thanks, Mom. I needed to hear that. I love you too." End of conversation. Wow. What finally reached through my somewhat thick skull was that she really didn't want advice! She simply wanted to be reminded that she is loved and capable of developing her own solution. And she wanted this reassurance from someone she knows dearly loves her--Mom.

I must confess that to stick by this understanding each time my daughter asks for advice is a challenge for me, the fixer of the world. But when I do, it continues to transform these types of conversations into an exchange of love and happiness.

Dream of Green Water

I had a sweet dream of grace, faith, and the feminine the other night. In the dream, I was swimming in the warm, almost opaque, deep green waters of Jamaica. It was a freshwater lake rather than the ocean. I was swimming with a friend while holding a book up above the water with one hand in order to protect it—a bit awkward. The swimming was still delicious and relaxed—the warm, silky water caressing my body. And simply moving my body was a delight. I was filled with contentment and well-being. The thought crossed my mind that I couldn’t see what was below me in the opaque water, but I easily dismissed it. I then decided to dive. I could have laid the book on a nearby rock wall, but I chose to clutch it to my breast, my heart, and dive with it! I remember a moment of hesitation about damaging the book, but I knew that closed, the book would survive with only minor wrinkling at page edge. I dove deep in the warm caress of the water and rose buoyantly back to the surface filled with joy. I woke with a smile on my face (unusual for this night owl).

End of the Rainbow

Yesterday I was literally at the end of the rainbow! It was a pretty magical day all in all.

I earn my living as a freelance tech writer and in this economy my business has done dried up! With tech writers being laid off left and right (always among the first), I have little hope of finding a job. No work, no income. On top of it, yesterday I received an email from my local chapter of our field’s professional association saying that the entire profession is basically going down the tubes! Oy! It’s bit of a scary time and I’m not doing well with the fear.

So, I’m re-evaluating. My passion in life is, as you may have gathered, connecting women and serving the Sacred Feminine. I love to facilitate circles (circle discussions)! But I keep telling myself that I can’t make money doing it. However, yesterday morning while making a cup of tea, I had one of those realizations of the obvious: I just need to claim that I can make money doing it. Metaphysics, positive thinking, Law of Attraction, all that business. So I claimed it. I declared aloud “I want to make money facilitating circles! I can make money facilitating circles! I am making money facilitating circles!” This is my mantra from now on. And, as we know of the Law of Attraction, I don’t have to know how it will happen; just that it will. I need to vibrate at the frequency of joy and faith that attracts it. As Mike Dooley from The Secret humorously puts it, I don’t have to know the cursed “hows!” I finally understood it at a heart level. Magical happening #1.

After this epiphany and thoughts on the Law of Attraction, I went to the used bookstore to trade some books and ran across the Abraham-Hicks book The Law of Attraction, for 6 bucks no less! Magical happening #2. I also found at the same lovely low price four other spiritual books I had read but didn’t own and wanted—even a Real Love book with my friend Star’s name in it! (I hold a Real Love group in my home.) Magical happening #3. It gets even better--at the register, all the books rang up not at $6, but at either $1.99 or $2.99! Magical happening #4.

When I left the store, the sun was shining for the first time all day and a light, soft sprinkle of rain was falling in the sunlight. An unusual but lovely thing to see. As I started to get in my car, suddenly the most perfect, full semi-circle, vividly colored rainbow appeared in the sky over the book store. It was magnificence across the sky! As my eyes traveled the rainbow to its closest end, I realized it was descending right there in the parking lot! The rainbow was actually landing between the store and where I stood, about 30 feet from me! When I looked back at the store, I saw it through transparent colors—the colors of the rainbow! I was literally at the end of the rainbow! I’ve never seen the end of a rainbow before. I was awed, dumbstruck! And imagine, this was happening immediately after buying The Law of Attraction, and after having made my declaration of abundance that morning. Wow! My next thought was the cosmos heard me! Thank you Spirit! Thank you for this magical, beautiful gift of confirmation! Magical happening #5.

I eventually got back in the car but did not leave until the rainbow dissipated. (Today I’m wondering why I didn’t walk over and stand in the rainbow, duh!) Once in the car, I called my friend Cheryl to share the magic. She didn't seem impressed. Her usual enthusiasm seemed lacking; in fact, she sounded distressed. It turns out she had just closed the door on a very upsetting exchange with a handyman. She told me my timing couldn’t have been better—she needed to hear a friend’s voice. Magical happening #6.

Do you know what the number six symbolizes in numerology? Balance, peace, beauty, and harmony. Loving family and where you are. It means being protective, conscientious, compassionate, and wanting to help family, community, the world at large. Six can also represent a flowing and cycles. Very appropriate and auspicious, don’t you think?

What a magical day! I am so blessed! I now can release my fear and hold faith. I know that love, prosperity, and all good things have already arrived in my life—and in yours. Thank you Spirit! I offer my gratitude to All That Is!

Too bad I didn’t think to take a photo of the rainbow or bring Larabee and her magic-capturing camera along!
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Note:
Magic Happening #7. Two days after posting this, astonishingly, I received an email from the executive director of the Society for Technical Communication. Somehow my little blog had come to her attention! (And not in a positive way, I should add.) She warmly requested a copy of the email I mention in the first paragraph above, as she had no record of STC sending an email claiming the profession is going down the tubes. I clarified that the email came from the local chapter and forwarded the requested copy. And, as you can see, I reworded said paragraph to more accurately reflect this. Who would have guessed? Now I'm truly convinced the Internet is making the world a smaller place!

Chaos and Birth

At the coast, sitting on a boulder along the beach I was watching the waves crash into the rocks and roll ashore across the sand, each wave pounding and foaming, rolling forth and retreating. I felt the salty mist spray my face and the sunny wind dry it away. I took in the great explosions of energy and re-energizing ions where these two great bodies—earth and sea—meet and felt calmed by them.

And then I noticed that while the sun glistened through the lovely translucent green, white-capped peaks of the waves, at the base they were dark and murky with churning sand and seaweed, bits of shell and who knows what else. I thought "chaos." Here I am at the conjunction of the vast Pacific Ocean and the North American continent, and it is chaos. Beautiful chaos. Great explosions of sound and energy and churning and turning, water rolling and retreating in constant motion. And it is murky and chaotic. It isn’t clear or orderly or well-defined where the land ends and the sea begins.

Doesn't chaos always give birth to something? Isn't chaos a medium of creation? Whether it is life itself, life-affirming, or life threatening, something is always birthed from chaos. Think of human birth. Now that’s a chaotic experience! The body seems completely beyond one’s control. Stars and planets are birthed from chaos. And from the chaos of a collapsing or overthrown government arises a new government. From any failure arises new ideas, attitudes, or efforts. Out of floods, fires, and hurricanes arise new structures and a new sense of connection and helping one another. Art arises from chaos; it doesn’t come into being in a neat, orderly fashion, does it?

And here at the shoreline, the buried, bubbling clams feed on the chaos. And where there are pockets of calm, tide pools and puddles cradle new life. So this chaos thing, the murky times with which we are so uncomfortable, just what might they give birth to? Granted, no one wants to live in a constant state of chaos, but if we are always running from it, will we ever allow ourselves the chance to find out what wants to be birthed?

Radiant Vessel

The following vision occurred on 4/21/07 during a workshop called “Revealing the Goddess Within” led by Rev. Terry zumMallen.

Rev Terry led us into meditation describing a scene of earlier ages where women of desert areas came to the community well to get water for their families. She asked us to picture a stone well and the women coming to it, only this well contained the water of life, the water that quenches the deep longing, the holy thirst in our soul. She asked us to visualize whom among our female ancestors we would want to see waiting at the well for us, whom among the females of our families gave us the unconditional love and nourished us with the water of life.

In my vision, I saw the old, round stone well. And rather than an ancestor appearing at the well, I saw a curvaceous, clear-glass vase, or vessel, rise from the well and hover just above the stone rim. The vase was comfortably two-thirds full of pure, cool, life-giving water from the Source. The edges of the water shone with the crisp white of sunlight passing through it. Suddenly the water began to glow, the illumination coming from within it and radiating everywhere (as with the Vessels of Peace, a radiant container). I could feel the warmth of the rays on my face and body where I faced the vase.

Then from the vase a tender green bush rose up, rapidly branching out and attaining a surprising height. At the ends of its gracefully curved branches sprung small, lacy, light-green fruits. All at once the fruits started dropping from the branches into the open, upturned mouths of human beings standing below them, like baby-bird beaks opening for food from the mother. As the human beings swallowed the fruit, it began to illumine their bellies and a glow to radiate from them. But each being did not realize what was happening until he or she noticed that another’s belly was glowing and quickly checked to discover that his or her own belly was as well. Each began to quietly chuckle and watch with amazement as the glow brightened into radiant beams of light, which crossed and merged with those from another person, then another, and then another. And the light grew in strength with each fruit consumed and each merging, until bright, radiant beams spread all across the flat, parched land. And where the beams fell over the land, precious green fruit bushes sprung up out of the barren land.

Symbiosis

The following vision arose in a meditation on 4/3/07.
In an ancient desert landscape, a vessel of water is set before me. I do not see the person who sets it down. The vessel is stunning in its detail. It is an unusually shaped, ancient water carrier—tall and cylindrically slim, elegant. It is perhaps two feet tall and six inches in diameter. It is formed of dark brown, treated leather that has been hardened and made waterproof. Around the sides of the vessel, a golden woven-grass fabric has been fused to the leather. A decorative border of the thick brown leather encircles the top and makes a vertical strip up the side. A shoulder strap is attached at each end of the vessel. The opening of the vessel sits on the top, covered by a snug, circular leather plug with a small pull tab attached. The plug is connected to the vessel by a thin strip of leather so that when the vessel is open, the plug hangs down its side. There is no pour spout. To obtain water, one inserts a long, slender dipper. The detail and quality of the workmanship is captivating.

I am handed the dipper that now holds a small, upright green plant with bulbous roots or rhizomes. There is no water in the dipper, simply the plant with its clean, bulbous roots. I am puzzled how such fat roots appear to fit in the small bowl of the dipper. I am instructed that the plant can survive because it is able to sustain itself through the ability of its roots to hold water for long periods of time. However, it must have water eventually. In fact, it flourishes when it has a regular supply of water. The two must work “symbiotically;” The plant needs the water and the water needs to nourish the plant.

The dipper and plant are then lowered together into the vessel and when gently pulled out again, clear water covers the roots in the bowl. Now that the plant has been dipped, the water in the vessel is poured out in a stream that flows into other containers, and a crowd of women suddenly appears, eager and jostling each other for the water.

A man appears. He wants very much to participate in this water pouring and gathering, but he cannot do it. He doesn't have the patience and he quickly erupts into frustration, anger, and panic. Inwardly his heart is crying out to be a part of it, and he is ashamed that he cannot control his behavior or remain peaceful. He doesn't know what to do with the agony rising within him. Suddenly, he turns to face one of the women, and with a large paint brush begins painting furiously on her dress over her heart area. The paint on the brush is thick, but not thick enough for him. He tries sticking chewed chewing gum all over the area to plaster it up. As he does this, the woman stands still and centered. She looks directly at him, sorrowfully, trying to make eye contact. He will not allow the connection, and therefore, cannot receive her compassion.

At this point, only a few women remain and many children appear. They all appear to be developmentally disabled, and agitated. They cannot use language for some reason. They wave their arms wildly at the women and make angry shouting noises and grunts. They gnash their teeth and drool. I am puzzled by this scene; has the development of all children been obstructed, I wonder. The women make no move to comfort the children or defend themselves. They simply stand quietly, holding peace and radiating love.

Meeting with Ascended Masters

from 5/21/06 meditation

Tonight I am introduced to a council of ascended masters. I am surprised that they are all male. They tell me it is of no concern; it is only appearance. The setting is an ethereal Greek temple with pillars, and the cosmos for a ceiling. The masters all wear long, white robes and sit at a semi-circular table. I stand in front of the table. They introduce themselves as the Great Brotherhood and then come from around the table to stand with me. One pours a small amount of oil on the top of my head and dots my third eye with it also. They tell me I am now anointed, initiated. I am to begin working with them and go forth with confidence. I am to use my gifts to serve the I Am presence. One of the masters in particular will work with me. He steps forth and tells me his name. I somehow did not see him when they originally introduced themselves. The others tell me that he is younger than they are, but he is just as evolved.

I join them at their table, which has now become circular. We sit in stillness and I experience their love, auniversal love, and a feeling of confident peacefulness. Sitting with them, I feel ancient. I see a review of all the work I have done in this lifetime to reach this point. I am certain that from this point forward I can walk with confidence and the knowing of my connection with All That Is.

I Am with You

from 3/6/07 meditation

This evening's meditation was difficult. I couldn't quiet my mind. However, toward the end, a strong feminine presence arrived and announced, “I am the Magdalene. I am with you. I am here to bring breath to life, to give breath to the story, my story.”

More about the Visions

In the spring of 2007, I had a series of visions of women creating peace. The visions came during individual and group meditation. They unfolded before my eyes as if I were watching a movie, yet present in them somehow. They were stunningly beautiful, very moving, and sometimes puzzling. In the descriptions and illustrations here, I have attempted to convey the beauty and the power of the scenes that unfolded.

I believe these visions are meant to be shared. They are important for all of us to experience, and each in our own way, so I share them without interpretation (or little interpretation, anyway). I suggest you read a vision, and then sit quietly with it for a few minutes to see what arises for you. I welcome your comments and questions!

May these visions might bring you a sense of peace, hope, happiness, and connection with the Sacred Feminine.

Beth

Informative links on women creating peace and the Sacred Feminine:

www.gatherthewomen.org
www.millionthcircle.org
www.vesselsofpeace.com
www.grandmothersspeak.com
http://workingwithoneness.org
www.5wwc.org
www.sophiawwc.org
www.peacexpeace.org

If you know of others to add to this list, please post the URL in a comment.